Da Beach Trip
by FattySkeleton
Summary: Zim goes to the beach armed with Fish sunscreen. that turns you into a fish. with a pissed off Gaz, and a stupid Dib some ones going to be hurt and embaresed. TINY bathing suits, Zim and Dib being HOT, Akward ending moment! WOOT!


I own nothing.

"Class! We will be going to a doomed beach on a school trip that will doom you all by giving you skin cancer." Hissed Miss. Bitters.

"BEEEEEAAACH!?? WHAT IS THIS BEACH?" yelled Zim.

Dib turned and stared at Zim. "You don't even know what a beach is?"

"NO YOU LIE! ZIM KNOWS THIS BEACH. I AM NORMAL!"

Ring!

"Get out you horrible failures." Hissed Ms Bitters before she sank into the floor and became a shadow that raced out the door.

The students ran out of the room or jumped out of the window. As Zim walked down to the sidewalk, in his strange marching why of walking, Dib appeared in front of him scaring the holy space goop out of him.

"Ahh! Dib-monkey, what are you doing?"

"Zim. Do you know what a beach is?"

". . . food?"

"No, you alien scum it's the largest body of water on the earth. And you have to go. And when you do you will have no choice but to get in to the water. And you won't survive unless you turn in to a fish. HaHaHaHaHa." He laughed as he walked away leaving Zim frozen in fear on the sidewalk.

Down in Zim's labs.

"That stupid Dib-stink! He gave me the answer to this Skool trip all along. If I won't survive as an Irken invader I will survive as a FISH!" narrated Zim as he mixed random chemicals while laughing manically as random electricity went behind him. He spun around.

"Gir! You do not play in the high electric wires!"

"The pain! It tickles!"

At the beach the next day.

The sand was yellow. The water was green. The seagulls were mutated and you could see the toxic waste barrels floating in the water. Yeah, this is were the skool would take the kids.

The gross bus parked in the sand and out spilled the children that were all screaming to get out of the bus. On the last step was Zim looking kind of scared to get on to the slightly glowing sand.

"Come on Zim, you have to get ready for the beach." Said Dib with an evil look on his face as he gestured toward the beach tents that the kids were filling into to change. Zim took a hesitant step into the sand and began to make his way to one of the male changing tents. Dib went into the one right beside of it. A few minutes later both of the tent flaps were thrown open and out strode the two finest examples of male hotness.

Zim was in some pink and black swim shorts that had the Irken symbol on it. His PAK was disguised as a beach bag. And his body, he was built like a soccer player with ropy muscles on his arms and an outline of a 6 pack on his stomach. His skin was blemish free and not a mark of age was on it.

Dib was in black and blue swim shorts that had the swollen eyeball symbol on it. He wore a pair of prescription sunglasses. His body was a lot less muscled then Zim but he had a certain grace about him. Like if Zim was a lion then Dib was a jaguar, one all forward motion that just attacks head on and the other that stalks and hides in the night to wait for a weak moment. And his body was covered in scares from his fights.

In pure un-Dibness Dib walked past Zim over to the female tents and waited. In a matter of seconds a very pissed off Gaz walked out in a bathing suit that had every male except Dib drooling.

It was dark purple with a skull design on it and it was a one piece that managed to show more skin than a two piece. It was held up by her large boobs and was tied on with clear wire. She looked like an angel. A very pissed angel that would send you to your own personal hell with out a second thought.

"G-Gaz! What are you wearing."

She snarled at him, "This is dad's idea of what is normal beach wear for a child. I will kill him when I get back."

Gaz stalked off with Dib, buried under her stuff, following her as they looked for a spot on the very suddenly crowded beach.

There were only two spots left on the beach, next to Zim or next to Ms. Bitters.

That went to Zim. Really, what would you pick?

Zim was at the moment putting on some of his 'special' sunscreen, while all of the girls around him drooled at him as he rubbed it on his chest.

"ZIM!" yelled Dib as he launched himself at Zim.

Zim yelped and sprayed Dib with the sunscreen, but it did nothing to stop him. He tackled Zim and they began to roll around on the sandy beach and they managed to roll onto the tube of sunscreen and showered Gaz with it.

Both boys stopped fighting and stared at the sunscreen covered figure of evil that now loomed over them.

"You will pay with your lives." She snarled and picked both of them up by their antennas/weird hair and threw them so hard that they were launched way over the ocean. Then she noticed the pak tentacle that was attached to her leg.

"F*$ you Zim." Was all that came out of her mouth before she was dragged threw the air toward where she threw the boys.

Zim opened his eyes as he slowly woke up. He was under water. He gave a silent scream as he waited for the pain. It didn't come.

He noticed that his arm felt weird. He raised it up in front of his face and stared at the small green dorsal fin on it. He felt around his head and realized that his antennas had been replaced with another fin. He then felt his teeth. They were pointy.

He felt the water behind him shift right before he felt many appendages wrap around his body. He was suddenly face to face with the third most frightening thing he could think of.

Gaz.

She had many octopus tentacles coming from where her legs were supposed to be. Her bathing suit was gone and all that protected her from his view was twin trails of scales that went from her new tentacles to her chest, barely making her decent. Her hair had lost it's shape and floated around her face, like it to was a deadly weapon. Her amber eyes glowed at him in her anger.

Zim did the only thing her could think of. He swam. He squirmed in her hold and broke free. She lashed out in anger and tried to snare him again.

He swam away in fear, going blindly into the water as he tried to get away from the pissed human/fish girl.

He bumped into a warm body and looked up. There was Dib glaring at him, his large head covered in spines that were at the moment laid back like a deflated blow-fish. His feet were webbed now and so were his hands.

Zim turned his head and saw Gaz coming at him and did the only thing that made sense. He grabbed Dib and put his neck is mouth the new sharp teeth poking Dib's skin. Gaz raised an eyebrow and slowed as she watched Zim in slight interest of what he would do.

Zim motioned for her to leave with his hands and when she didn't he bit lightly on Dib.

Dib was shocked by the increased pressure and did the only thing that came as natural to him. He sucked in water and inflated his head causing the spines to poke Zim in the eye.

Zim let go of Dib and Dib swam away his head still inflated.

They all just looked at each other for a minute till a sound reverberated through the universe. Ms. Bitters yelling "IT'S TIME TO GO FAILURES!" their eyes widened and they all swam for their lives to make it to the beach.

There was a wonderful action scene that happened that I didn't want to write so make up your own.

Right before they had reached the shore they had realized how screwed they were. They were going way too fast. The shot out of the water and slammed into the bus window breaking it easily and lading in a now human/alien heap.

"What the f#$?!?!?"

"EARTH SLIME YOU WILL PAY FOR POKING MY EYE!!!!"

" . . . .Zim if you move of turn around I will kill you and everyone on this bus."

"What!?" said Zim as he got pulled backward by Gaz.

"Dib, Go get me some clothes."

Gaz's problem became clear to Zim when he remembered that her bathing suit had been destroyed. . . . and those lumps on his back were not grapefruits as he had originally thought.

for the first time in his life the reen akien turned a Bright red, and some where in the universe so wise old fart said to his young apprentice, "There is a disturbance in the force. And it's kind of horny."


End file.
